After work, I stopped by the old apartment. I have this fear that I am going to drive by and all my shit is going to be on the lawn. When I got there, I saw a sheet of paper taped to the door. I have 72 hours to get my shit and get out. That is not a lot of time, especially when I have only one of those three days off. If I can get the majority boxed up tomorrow, then I will feel much better. It means that I will not be able to slack, or hang out with friends, or even relax. I have to get this done. I have to. There is a lot of stuff in there, and I don't want to abandon all of it. I can't. I have nightmares about it.
In other news, life is going well. As usual, I have inappropriate feelings for someone. But, I am not telling them, or anyone else. I hope to all that is holy I have learned my lesson. This person is really awesome, but totally unavailable. So, you know, business as usual.
I am going to move in two months. I wish I had someone who would go with me tomorrow, but I don't really want to open myself even more to people who could possibly judge me. I know its not rational, but that is how I feel. I am hoping that by getting rid of stuff, life will be easier. I have the things that are important, and I have to remember that. I have my cat, most of my clothes, and my laptop. If I leave anything else, it can be replaced. I can't take it with me if I die tomorrow. It's the people that are important, and I need to reconnect with my friends. I miss them. I am supposed to hang out with Gina tomorrow, but this HAS to be done. And once its done, there will be a lot of time freed up and I would have a place to go to hang out with people. I am not embarrassed to have people over. Which is also why I am looking forward to moving in with Tammy.
Not only is she one of the nicest, sweetest people I know, she and I get along well, and she will keep me on the straight and narrow. I know she is not a clean freak, but she is not a messy bessie either. We would hang out when we could, but we would have our own rooms, and we would also be working opposite hours most of the time. I like her. I don't think I want to date her, but she is exactly the type of person I want in my life. She is fun, stable, and awesome. What more can you ask in a roommate?
Will keep you posted on the shoveling out of the dumpster. Now I am going to watch Man Vs. Food, the first season.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
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